Thirteen not so long years ago you came into my life for the first time, terrorizing my youth and ruining a 13 year old girls summer. In the years since then, I had slowly forgotten about your beady little red eyes, your outrageously loud buzzing and your absolute abundance. Life went back to normal. Eventually the night terrors stopped and the presence of a flying creature no longer made me run towards shelter like a maniac.
And then 2011 rolled in. In the early spring I started hearing rumblings about the cicada invastion that would take over a large portion of our state in late spring/ early summer. I prayed that it wasn't true. Surely it hadn't already been thirteen years! In retrospect, I should've had a countdown calendar so that I could've been more prepared for this plague [aka, taken six weeks off and gone anywhere that cicadas don't exist]. Alas, the math was correct and you bastards started busting out of your shells on Mothers Day weekend. Your tyranny on my life and effect on my hearing [that's actually true!] haven't stopped since.
Until now.
Now it's time for you to die, cicadas. DIE. There are already tons of you lying dead everywhere and your little friends are starting to get nervous because they know that their time is soon.
The Devil himself is waiting to receive you back where you came from and to that I say, God speed cicadas, God speed. Get thee back to hell and never come back [well until 2024]. Good Riddance!!!
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