Monday, August 29, 2011

VMA RECAP

The older I get, the more I think that I probably shouldn't care about watching the VMAs and that there are probably more important things that I could be doing with my time. But, every year, I just can't stay away. I just have to know! The performances! The fashion! The antics!

Speaking of antics.........Lady Gaga, or should I say Joe Calderone...........really??? Really. No, seriously, really? What the freakity frack was that bullshit? I really think she has lost her damn mind. Her performance was fine, but that opening monologue? What the?? And then she completely highjacked Britney Spears acceptance of the award- how low class was that?? You aren't funny! No one is bemused by your act. And Britney seemed a little uncomfortable [how could you not be??]. I hope Jo Calderone is the death of Lady Gaga. She needs to go away, once and for all.

On to the fashion!

WIN[?]

I simply adore, adore, adore Adele. Her hair looks phenomenal here and I love the shoes, but my one complaint about her is that she is so YOUNG and constantly looks like a spinster because of her clothing choices. I'm not saying that she needs to wear a dress cut up to her coochie, but come on sweets, bust out of the box a little bit and dress your age! She really has a fabulous, curvy figure and would look really great in a number of different cuts and styles, but I can't help but feel like she is a bit self conscious about it. I'm here to tell ya- break the mold! You look great!

MEH
I am so beyond over Justin Beiber. This outfit is just........I can't. I'm fine with the blazer, and I'm even fine with the red pants. But those glasses? No. Those shoes? Hell no! His disrespect for Kanye and Jay-Z's performance? You're dead to me, Beibs.

FAIL
Ok, so........Another reason that I hope Lady Gaga goes away soon is because she has upped the ante on "fashion weird" and now everyone is trying to "out weird" one another and, frankly, it's making my head hurt! Why, why, why when you are a gorgeous young girl with a smokin hot bod, would you not want to wear a cute dress that makes you look amazing? Why would you instead put on this very odd fashion concoction, dye your hair pink [purple?], and carry a parasol???? Why???? Katy Perry, listen to me and listen to me good. You are too good for this. TOO GOOD. Go back to black with that hair and wear something CUTE.

WIN
Selena Gomez is young but she gets it right almost every single time on the red carpet. Love this look for her. Well done!

MEH
So, I think Britney actually looked really great last night, and I happen to really like her black lace romper, but I had to give her a "Meh" because those shoes are just not doing it for me. Why, why, why are people making and wearing open toed boots? Please tell me on what universe that makes sense? I have to say, when I was at her show in Nashville last month, I couldn't help but notice how atrocious her shoes were and wondered if they were all left over from her original tours from over 10 years ago. Based on the fashion, I would have to say "yes". Perhaps these are from her show shoe collection? Guys, can we get her some new show shoes? Yes? Yeah? Great.
BUT

I had to post this picture too because I think she and Jason make such an adorable couple and he just looked incredibly dapper last night.

FAIL
See pretty much all Katy Perry comments above and feel free to apply them here. You wanna dress like a total freaking weirdo on stage and make it a part of your act? Fine by me! But on the red carpet?? Seriously, what is this?? So she's dragging around a super weird stuffed animal by a chain that is attached to her finger, she has on a ginormous ice cream cone necklace, a SARS mask [?], about 3 layers of tights, and ridiculous hair. I really just don't even know what to say here. I've got nothing. But again.......gorgeous girl and great figure. Quit hiding!

WIN
In the past, I have kind of been known to hate on Ne-Yo a little bit. I'm not sure why I was drinking his haterade, but I'll admit it, I just didn't like the guy. I'm also not a huge fan of Pitbull, but that song they did together is my JAM. I love this red carpet look for him. Sparkly grandpa sweater? Don't mind if I do, Ne-Yo!


FAIL
I'm fine with this dress, but with those shoes??? No ma'am. Fire your stylist.

MEH
J-Wow frequently needs to put her boobies away, and she should consider eating something [as well as figuring out what is making her face look so OLD]. Otherwise, she looked pretty great!

FAIL
Snooki on the other hand.....I'm glad that her Zantrex 3 is working out for her [she looks great!], but that dress is wearing her when it should be the other way around.

WIN
This dress is absolutely amazing on Kim Kardashian. Win win win!

FAIL
Uh, who invited Rainbow Brite to the VMAs? Deena happens to be one of my favorite gals on The Jersey Shore, but this mess has got to go! I have to say, I'm not even supremely mad at the dress, but the dress combined with that hella trashy hair and make up job is making me want to gouge my eyes out. She looks like she wore last nights hair and make up on the red carpet. Dats a big no no Deena, even for a Jersey girl.

WIN
Vinny on the other hand- MEOW!!! Let me see a little more of that chest tattoo mister!!

MEH
I've got an angel on one shoulder telling met that I love this dress and a devil on the other telling me that I hate it. I think the cut of this dress is really nice and I happen to think that over all, Miley looks great, I'm just not sure if I'm on board with the print and design.

FAIL
Ok, I have no idea what happened to Jessie J's foot, but if you were wearing a hideous bootie to the VMAs and happened to be the house band leader, wouldn't you consider wearing a long dress of some sort instead of accentuating the hideousness on your leg? Yeah, I would too. FAIL.

WIN
Rehab did Demi Levato some good [and evidently got her some new boobies!]. She has been looking really great [and healthy!] lately. Keep it up Demi!

MEH
I'm glad that JoJo is starting to be relevant again, but can we get her a new stylist? Thanks.

FAIL
Somehow I am not as mad at this look on Kreayshawn because she's straight from the crystal meth hoods of California, so she may not know better. It still gets a FAIL.

WIN
Now, I'm not one of those Twi-hards by any means and am not trying to be one of those age inappropriate girls who thinks that Taylor Lautner is hot, but he was looking pretty great on the red carpet last night. Not bad young one, Not bad at all!

UHHHHHH
1) when did JC Chasez get so old?
2) thanks for putting some effort into that outfit!

What did you guys think of the VMAs and the red carpet? Stay tuned for some of my favorite performances!

1 comment:

thenashvillian said...

Not only did Deena match her makeup to her Rainbow Brite dress, but she also matches her green color contacts to it as well. Yikes...