Um, Dear Britney....

I think I've seen this outfit before. Now if only I could figure out where.......

I Wouldn't Have Said No...

Jennifer Aniston Turns Down John Mayer's Marriage Proposal
By Fame News, November 27 2008

Jennifer Aniston turned down boyfriend John Mayer's recent marriage proposal, according to reports.

The former Friends actress - who was previously married to actor Brad Pitt - reportedly declined John's offer because she doesn't want to damage their relationship, which they recently rekindled following a split in August.

A source said, "Jennifer said no when John asked her. She told John that everything is so perfect between them right now, they shouldn't ruin the focus of their relationship.

"A wedding would be so stressful and Jennifer just wants to enjoy this phase, falling madly in love and getting a thrill if the other one texts when they are apart.

"John told Jennifer she is the girl for him and he is sure of it. He is willing to do anything she wants as long as they are together. He is like a different guy.

"John was over the moon when Jennifer took him back last month and he never wants them to be apart again. He really wants to settle down with her. He wants children, marriage - the whole thing at some point."

How Innovative

Alright, which one of the men in my life would like this for Christmas? I simply MUST get it for someone.

What is it you ask?

The website's description is:

Core Precision Undershirt
High-performance men´s underwear with engineered compression technologyenergizes the body with essential structure and support.Improve posture. Support back and core muscles.Visibly streamline. Control temperature.Street to sport, work to weekend. Up your game.

My description is- its an undershirt for insecure men that makes them look like they have a six pack.

Now who wants one?

Damn Columbia Cable!

I cannot BELIEVE I am missing this tonight. I guess I'll have to cross my fingers and hope for a re run next week sometime ( and repeatedly watch the clips below).



I dont think I believe this....




OH.MY.STARS!

I Have No Idea....

....why I think this is so funny (perhaps it's because I have a cat on my lap?), but I can't stop laughing.

Classic!

New Kanye

It's been brought to my attention that you can stream Kanye's new album "808's and Heartbreak" (genius title) on his myspace today before the album is officially released on Monday (which is kinda weird b/c normal release dates are Tuesdays?) . Click here  to check it out.

I'll give you my run down. First of all, I LOVE Kanye. I'm a big supporter of his music. I think he's pretty worthless as a human being, but as a musician I've pretty much gotta support everything he does. That being said, I don't like the fact that he's going all T Pain on us and using AutoTune synthesizer robot voice. In fact I hate it.

Song # 1 "Say You Will"- Kanye singing with said AutoTune synthesizer robot voice with a heart monitor-esque beat in the background. Um, this could be my least favorite Kanye song of all time. 

Song #2- "Welcome to Heartbreak"- A better beat, an actual rap, but still with the AutoTune synth! Seriously Kan? You are an innovator, but you are now essentially ripping off T Pain. T Pain!!! That is unnecessary.  You need not rip off anyone. Remember how you're a musical genius (or so you say). The synth worked in your bridge of "Put On", but just because you rocked it out on one song doesn't mean you need to do it for all songs.

Song #3- "Heartless"- This must be what happens when rappers get their hearts broken. They turn into robots. This song, yet again, starts with the synth voice. Thank Jonas (JEddy shout out) that it morphs into a normal rap........only to morph back into an AutoTuned rap. Better than the last two anyway.

Song #4- "Amazing"- No. It isn't. It isn't amazing.

Song #5- "Love Lockdown"- The first single. It's ok. Still in robot mode. It's not up to par in comparison with other lead singles from Kanye albums. Think "Golddigger" or freaking "Stronger". This song is supposed to compare???

It doesn't

Song #6-  "Paranoid"- The rap on this song is reminiscent of his part in Estelle's "American Boy". It's one of the better songs of the 6 we've reviewed so far. I could maybe jam to this one. 

Song #7- "Robocop"- I think the title says it all.

Song #8- "Street Lights"- This one is ok, but would probably be better if it were a John Mayer song circa "Room for Squares".

Song # 9- "Bad News"- Yep. Just like this album.

Song # 10- "See You In My Nightmares"- No. No, no, no, no, no. I basically stopped actually listening to the songs right around here. I'm surprised I made it this far.

Song # 11- "Coldest Winter"- Oh, you're cold? Why don't you start a fire- and then put Kanye's new cd in there.

Song # 12- "Pinocchio Story"- This is a live freestyle. I'm not sure what show it's from, but I can pretty much guarantee that it isn't Bonnaroo ( i don't hear the sound of bottles hitting the stage). It doesn't sound like the other over produced synth crap on this album. It's got that going for it.

I'm sad. 

This is not an album that I'm going to rush out and buy- that was NOT the case for the last three Kanye albums. I couldn't get them fast enough. I'm honestly not even worried about picking this one up. There is too much of Kanye trying to sing in robot voice, and if I had to guess, there was too much weed involved in the recording process. The album ends up all sounding the same due to the synth. There is nothing to distinguish one song from the other. Where is the Kanye we know and love? Where are the awesome beats- you're a PRODUCER man! Where are the zingy one liners we know and love? Why do you look like Fonsworth Bentley? 

Kanye, I'm sorry your heart is broken, but I hope you get laid soon so you'll start making good music again.

Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston Have a Talk...

[Ringtone: *I CAN BREATHE FOR THE FIRST TIME...I'M SO MOVIN' ON...YEAH, YE—*]

Brad?

How'd you know it was me?

Because my phone plays "Since U Been Gone" whenever you call.

But I've changed my number three times since we broke up.

Yeah I know.

[Beat.]

Yeah, anyway...Uh, I think you probably know why I'm calling.

Yeah—I do. Look, the movies are totally different, thematically, so I don't see us as being in direct competi—

No. Not that.

Oh. Then what? Not that 'Vogue' thing.

Yes, that Vogue thing.

Brad, that was taken TOTALLY out of context.

What was the context?

Well, the interview guy was like, "What did you think about Angelina talking about the two of you hooking up on Smith, and I was like, "What she did was very uncool."

So how is that out of context?

Well, like, he never said, this one's going on the cover.

[Beat.]

Look, I just wish you could move on.

I HAVE moved on, Brad. This was all a hundred years ago! I said as much on Oprah!

Fine.

Oh, and could you tell your mom I can't wait to see 'By The Waters of Babylon' with her Saturday night? Doing this Geffen Playhouse subscription with her was the best—

[*Click*]

Oh Me. I Love Animals.

see more puppies

I Wish I Could Still Use This Excuse

more animals

HeeHee

see Sarah Palin pictures

Sporty Spice- is that you??

I kept waiting for this video to get good- trust me, it does.

Era Era What?

THIS.....

....makes me want to throw up.

Don't Forget About Tonight!

An all new episode of 30 rock!

An Open Letter...

Dear Everyone In My Apartment Complex:

I have issues with you. Things we need to talk about before drastic measures are taken.

To the person who lives across from me. Please shut your yappy dog up. What I think is happening is that you're getting up early in the morning to shower and letting your dog out onto the porch and you can't hear him when he incessantly barks for at least 20 minutes. What I would like for you to keep in mind is that, while this might be the time that you get up everyday, most everyone else is STILL ASLEEP!!!!!! And your dog barks at everything that MOVES!!!!! and it is hard for me to SLEEP!!!!!! i love animals, i really do. And your dog is cute! But he is so freaking annoying. Please leave him inside where the rest of us can't hear him.

Also, just in generality (but more specifically to the people that live above me), could we leave any kind of drilling to be done after, say, 8:30 am?? I dont think that's unreasonable, right? I mean you already STOMP around like elephants at all hours of the day (and night), play really loud music, and sometimes get into wrestling fights- can we keep the early morning drilling to a minimum?

If we can accomplish these things, then we will be a better, stronger community! Say it with me peeps- YES WE CAN! YES WE CAN!

x-

Your Friend Lela

Was It Moonshine?

Drunk people are so funny!

Who Says Hurricanes Aren't Fun?

They Call This One- Drunk Fail

Facebook.

Does it annoy anyone else when old people use facebook? I mean, isn't that what myspace was invented for?? I get opening facebook up to highschools, and keeping it available to young adults who had it when it was first invented, but our PARENTS? ew.

I suppose I've always known this about myself, but I discovered that I felt strongly about it when Spring but out a new commercial with their old man CEO talking about how cell phones rule the world now and we can even check our Facebook on them! Um, excuse me? 

I can check my facebook on them. You can maybe check your stock options or the weather. Or LinkedIn. I'll give you LinkedIn.

So old people. Stop trolling for young people on Facebook. Don't poke your kids friends. Stop sending me application requests (that goes for all of you). Facebook is a classy establishment. Let's keep it that way.

This is Hilarious!!!

http://perezhilton.com/2008-11-10-dont-piss-on-our-leg-and-tell-us-its-raining

Talk about being wasted.

New Jersey councilman Steven Lipski was got so drunk at a concert this past weekend that he….urinated all over a crowd of concertgoers.

For reals!!!!!

This past Friday, Lipski went to a Washington, D.C. nightclub to watch the Grateful Dead perform.

However, turns out he was so intoxicated that he proceeded to pee on the concertgoers from his balcony spot at the club.

EWWW!!!!!

Lipski was arrested and charged with simple assault. However, the peepee king has decided to stay mum about the incident.

He said in one recent interview yesterday, "I've resolved not to touchalcohol again."

And added in another interview that the incident was "deeply humiliating, very embarrassing, and troubling."

Even more troubling, the 44 year-old has decided not to admit to the peeing stunt.

He did say, "I can't comment on that. I'm going to continue to do all the good things, and I'm not going to let this overshadow me."

A source adds, "I spoke to one of his contributors this morning, and he's denying the whole thing. He's telling people he spilled a drink. It's ridiculous. He's already said he's not resigning. He's telling people that."

Too bad that Lipski was spotted by one of the club's staffers relieving himself at 9:50pm from the club's balcony.

Shady politicians!

Who Needs Marriage?

When you have the boyfriend pillow? Shit, I can buy my own self a diamond ring (.....kindof.....)- combine that with this pillow and LIFE. IS. GRAND.

Separated At Birth??? Twin Cousins???

This was pointed out to me today and I just had to share. Is Peggy Hill the cartoon version of Sarah Palin? Or perhaps, is Sarah Palin the real life clone of Peggy Hill? Are they twins separated at birth, or is Sarah just the prettier version of Peggy? Are these two 2/3 of a triplet set that also includes Tina Fey?

The World may never know- but Gosh Darn will we be curious!

Um, do ya think?!

I don't mean to turn this into a political blog, because it certainly isn't, and eventually the politically charged posts will disappear. But I couldn't resist posting this video from Fox News.

Stop It

I gotta say, Barack Obama's acceptance speech the other night was really great. And I found it to be especially moving when nearly the entire crowd in Grant Park began chanting "Yes We Can!". This chant could possibly have been one of the most effective parts of Obamas campaign.

But....

The campaign is over now. Know what that means? It's time to take down your yard signs, and stop the chant! Appropriate at an Obama rally? Yes. Appropriate at the Daily Show? Nooooooo. 

I was watching the Daily Show last night and he was doing a few little funny bits on Obama and suddenly the members of his audience start chanting "Yes We Can! Yes We Can!". Yes we can what? Yes you diiiiiiid. In that circumstance, the chant was possibly the most annoying thing of all time. 

My suggestions:

* Let's work on a new chant. Let's give this one a try "B-A-R--A-C-K! Barack will take us all the way!" or " Obama, Obama, he'll work hard for your mama!"

* Let's try to keep the chanting, in general, to a minimum. For example, at Obama rallies- appropriate. At a football game? Nooooot appropriate.

In a nutshell- the chant has gotten annoying. Just Sayin!

Yew Sound Lik Yor From LON-don!

This could be the best idea I've ever heard. Rumor has it that Russell Brand is in the works to play Jack Sparrow's younger brother in the 4th installment of Pirates of the Caribbean. Um, BRILLIANT. I wrote about Forgetting Sarah Marshall a couple of posts ago, but it really was sooooo funny, not just because of Russell Brand, but definitely enhanced by Russell Brand. I think Pirates would definitely be enhanced by him. I hope this rumor turns out to be true. 

Read about the rest of it here

Is it SO WRONG....

...that i think this song is adorable. Damn you American Idol!!!

She's so Cute

November 11th.

Listen Trick...

This better fucking not be true!!!!!

Get your own man!

She doesn't know....

...that we can see her undies, does she?

Oh boy. This is embarassing for all of us.

Finally!

The election is over and we have a new President.

Dear Obama and Biden:

Now that you are officially the president and vice president elect, you can stop wearing american flag color coordinating ties!

Naw, I'm just kidding- you guys are adorable!

I Love that Dirty Dirty

These Are A Few of My Favorite Things....

I have never been more ready for an election to be over than I am this one. I hardly even care who wins anymore, I'm ust tired of hearing about it.

I'm not, however, tired of watching the political SNL skits, and frankly I doubt they will ever be old to me. Enjoy one from this past weekend!